Sunday, May 29, 2005
help .
i feel like i'm on cloud nine.
head's like spinning around and around.
aching all over please.
my brain is burnt.
okay but i still survived the stupid work.
ohmygod.
i nearly died.
ohwells.
i think i'd be grounded tomorrow.
boring sia.
help me outttt.
m e l i s s a || s i x t y f i v e 10:59 PM
Saturday, May 28, 2005
sicksicksicksick
*jumps around-
it's retarded.
but i'm darn happy.
just cause i'm down with fever.
like ever since yesterday.
ohwells.
i still have work tomorrow.
rest assured.
i told yvonne if i faint.
i'll find a person ta tell her.
and she can pick me up.
but i doubt i'm that lucky lar.
okay i think it sounds crazy.
whatever.
and please.
i'm not like advertising.
nor like getting self pity here.
m e l i s s a || s i x t y f i v e 10:58 PM
Thursday, May 26, 2005
crap .
whateverplease.
mymotherisbeingabitchcan.
farklarrr.
itisalwaysme.
likeiowethemilife.
pleaselor.
justshutthhefuckup.
freakman.
ohwells.
whothehellcaresanyway.
m e l i s s a || s i x t y f i v e 11:14 PM
cool-ness .
ohmygoodness.
liverpool won !
yeah.
they made it.
the match was fucking interesting.
thugh it was both side defence.
it was close larr.
ac milan could have gotten it.
dudek shone after all.
he made his mark.
was a pity if you missed the match.
final score after ninety minutes 3 all.
extra time stil 3 all.
penalty liverpool won 3-2.
they didnt take their last shot.
worth staying up.
american idol results up next.
two and a half hours.
giving the last try.
say you want it out right.
end off here.
takecare.
m e l i s s a || s i x t y f i v e 5:31 AM
Wednesday, May 25, 2005
464775293
okay.
i wonder if anyone even reads.
ohwells.
i've gotten a new temp job.
starts today.
yvonne got it fer me.
it's like fer two weeks only.
dont know if i'd continue or something.
at least i have something ta do.
in short the mind needs a rest.
though it's hard ta.
it's not where it supposed ta be.
it's back to where it started out from.
things said meant another.
oh yah.
watch the champions league final tonight.
tomorrow morning rather.
doubt it'd be another boring fa cup final.
cause that match sucked big time please.
penalty shoot out is not the way out.
end here.
takecare ya'll.
m e l i s s a || s i x t y f i v e 10:09 AM
Monday, May 23, 2005
rahhh .
you've been the first in my life
who has ever made me feel this way
and i will not deny
i'm gonna need you right here
by my side
right.
i havent been here in eons.
a week rather.
just came back from work awhile ago.
the walk home was long.
i dont know why.
but i just started stoning.
then i miss my stop.
yes.
retarded i know.
was thinking of something lars.
ohwells.
no one's home right now.
all out.
there were quite alot of people today.
and yesterday.
but still can manage.
work was tiring.
but who cares.
and my back farking hurts okay.
could have just fainted.
sucks lar.
it still is painful can.
okay.
i'm jobless please.
i need to find a new one.
i was told that if people are needed.
then i can go work.
rah-ness.
i wonder who planned that.
now i gotta save money.
cant go shopping.
though i just got my pay.
how stupid is that please.
i cant get what i want anymore.
sighs.
my friend asked me stay home.
and become mushroom.
you know fungus and mould.
or be a maid.
with lousy pay.
crap.
i just need a job.
i am gonna miss working there.
yes you got that right.
so much how i hate going to work sometimes.
i'd still miss it.
well probably the people i guess.
the good thing.
i wont hafta wait fer that long long 166.
nor face irritating people.
and those who simply love to complain bout everything.
seriously.
it's horrible.
everyday i face such people can.
get this.
all men.
crap.
anyhows.
nothing else ta update lar.
work fer the past week.
except saturday.
was pretty fine.
been going home after work.
except wednesday.
thats all.
simple.
nothing complicating.
thats me.
i am hungry.
only had a piece of bread today.
pasta fer dinner.
i cant wait.
off to bathe then.
sho hot.
till my next entry.
takecare.
i didnt mean it when i said
i didnt love you so
i should have held on tight
i never should have let you go
i didnt know nothing
i was stupid
i was foolish
i was lying to myself
i couldnt have fathomed
i would ever be without your love
never imagined i'd be sitting
here beside myself
cause i didnt know you
cause i didnt know me
but i thought i knew everything
i never felt
the feeling that i'm feeling
now that i dont hear your voice
or have your touch and kiss your lips
cause i dont have a choice
oh what i wouldnt give
to have you lying by my side
right here cause baby
when you left i lost a part of me
it's still so hard to believe
come back baby please cause
we belong together
who else am i gonna lean on when times get rough
who's gonna talk to me on the phone
till the sun comes up
who's gonna take your place
there aint nobody better
hh baby baby
we belong together
m e l i s s a || s i x t y f i v e 4:51 PM
Saturday, May 14, 2005
.
good morning
it's kinda early
now i dont really remember going off to sleep
having breakfast now
it's early fer one
and i havent had one in a long time
gosh
well yeah we're like getting ready to go out
i'm all ready
waiting fer everyone else
it's my cousin's wedding
everyone in my house is involved in it
okay except my father
he's so happy about it please
anyhows yesterday was a long one
preparations and all
met the aunts and cousins
the aunts were like marry-ing off their daughter
so is my mum
they claim that there hasnt been a wedding in the family in ages
which causes this excitment
oh wells
it's rather a biggie i must say
but all the customs in it
are like troublesome please
hmmm was at holland last night
tango's isnt a bad place fer chillouts
but cousin sis one of my aunts and i were at walawalas
cause the other one was crowded
and i doubt i'd head home tonight
gonna stayover
yay-ness
dont hafta be back home
todays gonna be long
the night would be longer
yeah
gotta be off
takecare
iwannaknow
whoevertoldyouiwaslettinggo
causeisaidefore
iwillnotgiveyouup
m e l i s s a || s i x t y f i v e 6:46 AM
Friday, May 13, 2005
for you .
i dont know whats happening between us right now. all i want is fer us to work out right. i dont wanna live a life without you. hear me out this time please. i love you so much. i dont wanna let you go. i cant and i wont. maybe it's like one of those phrases again. but i mean it. i never loved someone this much before. not because of how long we've been together and all. but it's what we have been through together. and everything that came with it. the good. the bad. everything. it made me learn something new. it made me understand what love was. and how important you are to me. times that were spent with you. were special to me. i'm glad to have you. guess the best thing i got from you. was knowing that you were settling down fer me. i was really happy. i didnt want to let you down in any way. fer one to settle down fer me. was like the best thing. i know i've done you wrong before. that was the past. i'm really sorry about it. i'm not gonna say. since you play why cant i. i was wrong on my part. but i just wanted someone to be there. i can tell you. i dont like being lonely. i dont like not having anyone to care about me. i dont like it. before we were together. all those sweet messages you sent to me. those small things you done fer me. each time i knew someone was thinking about me. made me smile. i am happy that way. i am happy knowing that someone bothers about me when i am unhappy or feeling sick. someone reminds me to take my medicine. someone to visit me. someone to takecare of me. i felt so loved and wanted. i miss you alot. all the outings. and chilling out. the hugs. the kisses. the laughter. the smile. the disturbing. the conversations. the sweet talks. the nice messages. the everything. i miss them all. i want us to work out. i love you.
m e l i s s a || s i x t y f i v e 2:51 PM
friday the thirteenth .
today
today
today
today
whatstodayabout
fridaythethirteenth
whatthehell
tummyhurtslikecrazy
ohwells
probablybemeetingmyauntslater
cousinisgettingmarriedtomorrow
yup
m e l i s s a || s i x t y f i v e 10:32 AM
Thursday, May 12, 2005
yeah .
it's finally thursday.
eunica's in my house now.
wow.
which resulted to me using the computer.
listening to the music rawks.
anyhows.
so i went fer the eye check.
and know what.
i hafta be back there in about TENdays.
again
how i love that place so much.
stewpid please.
and i woke up early today.
had mac fer breakfast.
i never woke up early fer breakfast.
think the last time was a coffeebean one ?
i think.
it seems like the mtv and the computer is competing.
see whos music ish better.
definately mine.
i have a better sound system.
like duh.
whatever.
i'm typing nonsense please.
stop here larhs.
takecare.
let's talk this over
it's not like we're dead
was it something i did
was it something you said
dont leave me hanging
in a city so dead
held up so high
on such a breakable thread
you were everything, everything that i wanted
we were meant to be, supposed to be, but we lost it
and all of our memories, so close to me, just fade away
all this time you were pretending
so much for my happy ending
m e l i s s a || s i x t y f i v e 1:26 PM
Wednesday, May 11, 2005
three hundred sixty degree turn .
it's midnight.
i passed tuesday.
like finally.
today's weather simply sucked.
i got cooped up at home.
whatthehell.
it probably got my mood dampened.
hate rainy weathers fer a reason.
it makes me gloomy.
whatever.
anyhows.
later gotta go to the optician.
again
how cool is that.
it's been four weeks.
and it'll be my third visit.
anyone nice enough to go with me ?
sigh.
kkie going alone is no biggie.
it's not anything major anyway.
ohwells.
i just like company.
i'm standing on a bridge
i'm waiting in the dark
i thought that you'd be here by now
theres nothing but the rain
no footsteps on the ground
i'm listening but theres no sound
isnt anyone trying to find me ?
wont somebody come take me home
it's a damn cold night
trying to figure out this life
wont you take me by the hand
take me somewhere new
i dont know who you are
but i, i'm with you
i'm looking for a place
searching for a face
is anybody here i know
cause nothings going right
and everythigns a mess
and no one likes to be alone
m e l i s s a || s i x t y f i v e 12:00 AM
Tuesday, May 10, 2005
lost .
good morning.
i am like still awake.
might as well not sleep.
goodness me.
i've never been awake so long fer a long time.
been thinking bout something.
imissher.
m e l i s s a || s i x t y f i v e 4:34 AM
facade
bothmyeyeshavebeentwitching.
ihatethatfeelingplease.
thelasttimethathappened.
itotallyregretteditcoming.
ireallywonder.
whatsitthistime.
ithinkicanjuststayupallnightthinking.
cai li kai mei duo jiu jiu kai shi dan xin jin tian de ni guo de hao bu
hao
zheng ge hua mian shi ni xiang ni xiang de shui bu zhao
zui du du na ke ai de mo yang hai you zai ni shen shang xiang xiang de
wei dao
wo de kuai le shi ni xiang ni xiang de du hui xiao
mei you ni zai wo you duo nan ao( mei you ni zai wo you duo nan ao duo
fan nao)
mei you ni fan wo you duo fan nao( mei you ni fan wo you duo fan nao duo
nan ao)
chuan guo yun ceng wo shi zhao nu li xiang ni ben pao
ai cai song dao ni que yi zai bie ren huai bao
jiu shi kai bu le kou rang ta zhi dao
wo yi ding hui he hu zhao ni ye dou ni xiao
ni dui wo you duo zhong yao wo hou hui mei rang ni zhi dao
an jing de ting ni sa jiao kan ni shui zhao yi zhi dao lao
jiu shi kai bu le kou rang ta zhi dao
jiu shi na me jian dan ji ju wo ban bu dao
zheng ke xin xuan zai ban kong wo zhi neng gou yuan yuan kan zhao
zhe xie wo dou zuo de dao dan na ge ren yi jing bu shi wo
m e l i s s a || s i x t y f i v e 12:47 AM
Monday, May 09, 2005
maybe it's true .
well well.
just finished watching friends.
a daily thing.
well sorta.
today's the same as any other normal day.
the person who set my schedule is dumb.
i'm off the whole darn week.
like that win already lar.
wahlaoeh so irritating please.
anyhows.
will anyone watch kingdom of heaven with me.
will anyone watch amityville horror with me.
gosh i've gotta find things to do till friday.
weekend's my cousin's wedding.
so yeah.
at least monday's over.
ohoh.
just a thought.
since i'm like going a to a school.
which somehow.
doesnt require much of what i learnt in the past.
is it like a total waste in a way.
like mug so hard which all ends up to like useless.
damnit.
well yeah.
blame it on the fact that.
i didnt study hard enough.
get to where i want.
study what i really want.
this one i'm doing.
know what actually.
ui decided on it there and then i saw the course.
how powerful it that.
now i simply cant wait to get started.
i cant stand this emptiness in life.
l o s t .
ohwells.
it's just another day in may.
m e l i s s a || s i x t y f i v e 11:30 PM
Sunday, May 08, 2005
learning it the hard way .
work today.
no words to describe please.
firstly it was raining.
three quarter of today was spent freezing.
i practically had nothing to do.
my sales was like as good as nothing.
i totally didnt have a thing to do.
other than this incident.
he bought an admission ticket from me.
asked fer directions and i told him.
like hello.
i was explaining it to him again.
cause he looked blurr.
i didnt want him to loose his way either.
and he gave me this fucking attitude.
asking if i had a problem.
he kept saying i was rude and what crap.
like that win larr.
go ahead complain about me.
i didnt do anything wrong please.
only one thing ta say.
men !!
such a bastard.
what a day.
m e l i s s a || s i x t y f i v e 11:04 PM
Saturday, May 07, 2005
untitled .
i open my eyes
i try to see but i'm blinded by the white light
i can't remember how
i can't remember why
i'm lying here tonight
and i cant stand the pain
and i cant make it go away
no i cant stand the pain
how could this happen to me
i made my mistakes
i've got no where to run
the night goes on
as i'm fading away
i'm sick of this life
i just wanna scream
how could this happen to me
everybody's screaming
i try to make a sound but no one hears me
i'm slipping off the edge
i'm hanging by a thread
i wanna start this over again
so i try to hold onto a time when nothing mattered
and i cant explain what happened
and i cant erase the things that i've done
no i cant
how could this happen to me
i made my mistakes
i've got no where to run
the night goes on
as i'm fading away
i'm sick of this life
i just wanna scream
how could this happen to me
i made my mistakes
i've got no where to run
the night goes on
as i'm fading away
i'm sick of this life
i just wanna scream
how could this happen to me
okay .
that song's currently playing.
kinda like it though it's a sad one.
who cares.
i'm like the sad song kinda person.
yupps.
thankyou to everyone who.
sms-ed me.
left me testmonials.
called me.
tagged me.
and most importantly spent the day with me.
it's really sweet of you all to remember.
back in stc days.
it's like one of the days i look forward to.
presents.
wishes.
surprises.
everything great.
well guess each year is something different right.
still, thankyou to everyone.
it's a meaningful one to me.
one that i'll remember.
wei ling.
yee wai.
mich, my sis.
eunica.
jaryne.
azure.
jasmine.
luying, cousin.
heather.
kaye, dear.
wanru.
angel.
larine.
sarah.
adrian, my bro.
novelyn.
cecilia.
pamela, my erzi.
amanda.
germaine, my nuer.
denise.
liyi, my mummy.
maysi.
shirley.
violet.
charlene.
carrera.
kaining.
shufen.
physilia, my nephew.
mardi, my daughter.
valerie.
esther.
rachel.
mumtaj.
huiling.
stephanie.
lyana.
danica.
xiaoxuan.
family.
relatives.
this one's nice too.
empty spaces fill me up with holes
distant faces with no place left to go
without you within me i cant find no rest
where i'm going is anybody's guess
i've tried to go on like i never knew you
i'm awake but my world is half asleep
i pray for this heart to be unbroken
but without you all i'm going to be is incomplete
voices tell me i should carry on
but i am swimming in an ocean all alone
baby, my baby
it's written on your face
you still wonder if we made a big mistake
i've tried to go on like i never knew you
i'm awake but my world is half asleep
i pray for this heart to be unbroken
but without you all i'm going to be is incomplete
i dont mean to drag it on, but i cant seem to let you go
i dont wanna make you face this world alone
i wanna let you go alone
i've tried to go on like i never knew you
i'm awake but my world is half asleep
i pray for this heart to be unbroken
but without you all i'm going to be is incomplete
incomplete
alright.
end here.
takecare.
m e l i s s a || s i x t y f i v e 10:52 PM
Friday, May 06, 2005
MYday .
-smiles .
happybirthday mich !!
and to me. ha.
it's our day.
and it's pouring outside as well.
what a day.
rights ?
hopefully it'll be better.
-wonders.
okay.
and thankyou to everyone.
fer remembering !!
all the sms-es were sho sweet.
thankyou.
thankyou.
thankyou.
it definately made my day.
m e l i s s a || s i x t y f i v e 1:45 PM
Wednesday, May 04, 2005
think .
i dont wanna feel
the way that i do
i just wanna be
right here with you
i dont wanna see
see us apart
i just wanna say it straight from my heart
i miss you
it's so late already.
cant seem to fall asleep.
gosh.
hafta work tomorrow somemore.
sian arhs.
birthday's in 2 days.
i dont feel excited at all ?
sighs.
should i even look forward to it now.
i just miss her .
):
m e l i s s a || s i x t y f i v e 1:52 AM
Tuesday, May 03, 2005
wo bu zhi dao .
off today.
so bored please.
woke up kinda early.
still feeling sorta tired though.
ohwells.
now let's see.
i was working the whole long weekend.
and i'm finally off today.
but then again.
maybe going to work seems better.
alright.
found out yesterday that my granddad is in hospital.
he had this minor operation.
dont know fer what.
or how he's doing.
like no one told me.
and my aunt too.
she was admitted this morning.
again dont know why.
gosh.
like what's happening.
almost half the year gone.
and every month something happens.
in the family.
like whatthehell.
it sucks okay.
damn.
it's threedays away till i turn eighteen.
it's so fast.
wonder how will it be.
i dont wanna think.
i miss her so much ..
m e l i s s a || s i x t y f i v e 10:54 AM